Screaming at Glaciers

So I turned 46 on Sunday.  Age is not like it used to be.  When I was growing up, 'over the hill' meant 40.  I still feel young, even as my point of view is taking a more aged slant, but on certain things, I don't mind be the more mature voice.  One thing lately has me asking whether I'm becoming a cranky old man or is my concern valid.  It has to do with social media videos of young kids dancing like a drop of water on a hot skillet.

Kids dancing to pop songs is nothing new, but it has been ratcheted up a notch since a young 11 year old dancer named Maddie Ziegler, a professional, was featured dancing in the music video for Sia's song Chandelier.  Ever since, many parents and fans of dance are trying to find the next big thing and have been recording young kids dancing to other current pop songs.  For some reason, the unedited version of Nicki Minaj's Anaconda, a raunchy, hip hop song with a catchy hook is the current song-du-jour.

I'm no prude, but I am a father of three kids.  I'm not one of those parents who rails against popular culture like a caveman screaming at a glacier.  My wife and I evaluate popular culture as it comes.  Minecraft, fine.  A smart phone, and with it unfettered access to the web, not until 16.  Social media pages, currently no, but we'll revisit that on a case by case basis soon.  Yoga pants.  I laugh at people who will wear a Vikings jersey and tell me yoga pants should only be for yoga.  We will teach our kids to respect themselves, and their bodies.  When they get older, we'll address clothing styles as they come up, but no yoga pants until at least 16.  That's the choices we've made for our kids, you can make those decisions for yours.

It'd be easy to fall back to the last sentence, in regards to these young kid's dance videos.  "Matt, you don't like these videos, then don't watch them and don't put your kids in one."  I have stopped watching them, and I won't allow my kids to be part of one, but these videos cross the line from encouraging a kids passion, heading full steam into creating a bad environment for the kids, allowing the kids to be taken advantage of, and the over sexualization of your girls under the guise of viral video celebrity.

Let's start with the complexity of the dance routines themselves.  This isn't some kids getting together after school and learning a few dance steps.  This is hours of training, day after day, to get this level of precision.  The Minaj song came out in August, and even factoring in a dance students previous knowledge of certain moves, these kids must have put in a tremendous amount of time over the last few months.  It's not healthy for a young child, as they're not ready to engage in a serious, adult level of exercise.  Frankly, these kids don't look healthy for their age.  They look disturbingly thin.

How about the music?  I have seen other songs featured, but Anaconda is the most common for these videos.  What parent of a 10 or 11 year old thinks this song, unedited, is appropriate for their young kids?  It was at this point I was going to quote some of the lyrics from the song, but there is no way I can clean them up for this blog.  Search engine at your own risk!  I like the song, but I'm an adult.  We are careful with what our kids watch and listen too, but no one can convince me a responsible parent would allow their child to have the unedited version of that song on their playlist, let alone be coordinating a dance routine to it.

Not all of the dance moves in the videos are sexually suggestive, but quite a few are.  If I was to ever walk into a dance studio and see those moves getting taught to my 11 year old daughter, the instructor would be getting arrested.  I'm not joking.  You want to teach people 18 and older to dance that way, fine, but teaching young girls a routine more appropriate for a stripper is disgusting.

I mentioned exploitation earlier.  These dance videos seemed to be getting commissioned by dance studios or clubs, as banners and logos adorn the clothes of the kids and the walls behind them.  Why would you allow a dance instructor to have hours of access to your young child, work them like Vegas show girls, teach them a dance routine out of a Cinemax movie, to a song which would cause most adults to blush, and slap logos all over them like their NASCAR drivers, just so the dance studio can exploit your child in a viral video for their own self promotion?  Is the kid getting paid?  It's easy to fall back to, "the kid loves to dance," excuse, but kids love ice cream too.  We don't allow them to eat Rocky Road for dinner.  We're supposed to be the adults, and the parents of these kids should see what's really going on here.

It's at this point some people will be furious with me.  "You don't get it Matt.  You don't see the artistic nature of the dance, the ability, the sweat.  These kids are good!"  Rebuttal; You really don't get it.   Is it creepy or cool for a grown adult man to watch a dance video of an 11 year old, who is not family or a friend's kid, gyrate like they're a pole dancer?  It's wrong!  Unless their is a reason you're attached to a specific child in the video, it's wrong to post video of a junior high volleyball practice, a young boys swim meet, and regardless of the amount of bad choices and decisions being made by the parents, instructors, clubs and grown adults who think it's cool, it's wrong to pass along a video of a young girl's dance routine featuring inappropriate sexuality.  These videos are not something to be idolized.

The over sexualization of young children in a pathetic attempt for viral celebrity is wrong.  If that makes me a cranky old man, so be it.